Norumbega XXII was worried. The crown prince, Billy Bob, had disappeared during the night. He had not taken his duties very seriously, but was popular and replacing him would be difficult. It appeared that he had gone into one of the ascension boxes, attracted by the smell of rotting fish, and been taken up to heaven.

The lobsters knew, of course, that the creator of the universe had not put them there simply to procreate and die. He had a higher purpose in mind for them. In due course, if they lived the right life, they would be raptured up to a higher plane of existence. They would not know the details, but they were certain there was a paradise where they would have all the rotted fish they wanted without hunting for it. It would be served to them by comely maiden lobsters, who were also available for sex after the snack.

Or so they believed, but they had never had confirmation. Those who ascended never came back to tell what happened – with one exception. Back before anyone could remember a young lobster named Ezekiel had been raptured and returned. He told the following story:

The rapture box went up and up and finally left the water to enter a luminous, unimaginably bright world with a heavy aroma of rotting fish. There, a giant being – a god or an angel – had lifted him up from the box and was about to do something to his claws when it lost its grip and Ezekiel slipped back into the water and sank home.

There was much speculation as to what was in store for him if he had not slipped from the god/angel’s grasp. It looks as though he was being prepared for some purification ritual. A baptism, perhaps? After that, who knows? Certainly a higher order of existence, with light and music and sweet smells.

Norumbega sighed and wondered what he would do next. Billy Bob had no obvious successor and someone would have to be chosen. Elections were tricky, however and always posed a risk to the established order.